


Hindsight

by Reed_Writes



Category: She-Ra and the Princesses of Power (2018)
Genre: Angst, Blood and Gore, Eye Trauma, F/F, Regret, War
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-04-04
Updated: 2019-04-04
Packaged: 2020-01-04 16:12:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 802
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18347129
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Reed_Writes/pseuds/Reed_Writes
Summary: Some things can't be undone.





	Hindsight

**Author's Note:**

> This work was based on a pair of pieces by the wonderful Ciel!  
> https://twitter.com/DragonSmooches/status/1113684140753219585  
> They are included here with their permission. Please make sure to check them out at the source!

_Squelch._

Catra knew what it felt like to use her claws. Better than she should. It didn't feel like that. Didn't sound like that. 

The texture was all wrong. It was too… _wet._ Her eyes darted down to her blood soaked hand, only for a moment. There was too much of it. She knew how deep she could cut. Knew the feeling of rending skin beneath her claws. Knew how much blood someone should bleed. This was too much.

Before she could lift her gaze again, it was too late. It had only been a moment, hadn't it? But that's all it took. Catra screamed, her face erupting in a sudden burst of pain that quickly numbed to shock as she stumbled back - blind, but not knowing why. 

She fell to her side, gasping for breath and finding herself inhaling something else - blood. Her own, this time.

For a moment, the battlefield seemed to fade away. The stench of burning death that seared her faded to nothing as she hacked and coughed, despite the pain of her cracked ribs. 

But then it was back, fresher than ever. The acrid smoke that flowed around them pervaded her, stinging her eyes as she tried to see again and filling her lungs as she gasped for breath.

Catra blinked, once and then once again as her eyes refocused. She saw her hand first, still covered in blood, dripping from her claws and running down her arm to soak into the fur. Beyond it, She-ra. Her boots, scuffed and dirtied and spattered with grime and gore. They moved, one squelching, full of blood from a wound on her shin. 

She didn't want to look up. Didn't want to know. But she had to. That sound - that feeling… It wasn't right.

Catra wanted to scream at herself. Instead, she let her eyes go, dread drowning her heart as they rose. 

She didn't know how to describe her expression. Disgust? Fear? Apprehension? She felt all those things and more - much more. Horror. It was horrifying. 

Adora - not She-ra. She wore Adora's face. What was left of it. What her body looked like didn't matter.

Catra grit her jaw, forcing back the tears that wanted so, so badly to come as she wished with all her might that she could look away.

An eye. 

She'd taken an eye.

She couldn't hold on.

Catra retched, heaving and gagging as nothing came up and the tears began to sting the fresh wound that marred her face. 

She hadn't wanted that! She hadn't _aimed_ for that. 

_But I went for her head._

Her vision blurred as she writhed on the ground, focusing and unfocusing on the ruins of her mask and She-ra's headpiece, mere feet apart and laying together in ruin between them. 

The image of Adora's face, the eye she'd had left meeting Catra's gaze with that _dead_ look, the lifeless expression she'd worn - it wasn't _right_. That couldn't happen. Shouldn't happen. Not to Adora. 

She wasn't strong enough to hold anything back now. Her chest burned, the taste of her own blood rising in her mouth as she coughed and spluttered. 

Part of Catra was vaguely aware of the clatter as the Sword of Protection fell to the dirt. Part of her was conscious as her old friend sank to her knees.

 _Friend_.

That was what she'd done. She'd hurt her friend.

Catra sobbed as the battle faded away. In its place, the barracks - back in the Fright Zone, back home. 

She stepped through the door. 

Everyone was young again. There was Kyle, smiling as he talked to Rogelio - the only time he ever did. There was Lonnie, doing situps on the floor next to her bunk.

There was Adora. Sitting on the side of her bunk, her back to the door.

So young. Adora was still the soft, pudgy kid Catra had befriended all those years ago. 

Around her, the room seemed to darken as she entered. Her hand felt wet. She didn't want to look at it. 

Every step she took, the space seemed to shrink. The darkness encroached on everything - swallowing the others, blacking out the rest of the room until it was just her and Adora, standing a few feet apart. 

Catra didn't want this. 

Something forced her down. Catra fell to her knees, her head suddenly level with the little girl's, who sat unmoving, unflinching. 

She didn't want to see this. 

She couldn't close her eyes. They wouldn't let her. She tried to look away. She failed.

It was that same blank face. That same wound. As if it had always been there. As if she'd _always_ done it. 

Catra screamed.

She didn't do it! That happened _now!_ Not then!

But as she scrambled through her memories, they were all the same. 

Ruined. By her.

**Author's Note:**

> We will resume our regularly scheduled fluffy romance with the next fic, don't worry.
> 
> I'm still taking requests! Things have been slowed down by university work, but ideas are always welcome! Some people who have left comments on previous works might be glad to know I've started writing some of your suggestions - you'll just have to wait to find out which ones!
> 
> You can find me on twitter at @DarkPritchard :)


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